This week....I felt like walking out. I felt numb, overwhelmed, inadequate, and in over my head. I cried myself to sleep and woke up worried. Every classroom teacher experiences a year or even years like this. And every good teacher over stresses about whether they are effective...It comes with the territory. I prayed and asked God for the insight to reach my kids and some encouragement. He provided.
Today, I ran into one of my former parents whose child was transferred to another class at the beginning of the school year. The parent was very reserved, so I never really said much to her; we were cordial and our conversation was limited. So when her child transferred to the other class, even though I was heartbroken, I didn't think much of it. I remember the student being unusually distraught- overcome with emotion. But again, I didn't think anything of it.
Well when I saw the parent today, I just made the comment of how proud I am of the student and how I miss her in my classroom. The parent in concurrence, tells me that at the end of the school last year, she applied and her child was accepted into one of the magnet schools or private schools (I couldn't remember which one) in the district, but her child wanted to wait to see if I was going to be her teacher for this upcoming school year. So when she found out I was her child's teacher, seeing the excitement of her child, she declined the spot. The morning she found out her child was being transferred to another class, she received another opportunity for her child to be apart of this school and declined the offer for the second time. That afternoon when the child came home from school, she learned the news of the transfer.
What parent would decline an offer for his/her child to be in a specialty school? A parent who knows that teachers are the ones who have the ability to provide his/her child with quality education, one who is firm yet loving, and one who teaches accountability and responsibility in addition to academics. Though it was challenging in the beginning, the student is thriving in fourth and doing well. She hugs me every chance she gets and it was the encouragement that I needed.
I take my job seriously. Sometimes too seriously. But it's encouraging to know it's not in vain. Your character/reputation always precede you. Proverbs 12 talks about the benefits of being a hard worker in comparison to a lazy person. A hard worker will always find a way to lead and get what he wants. If you work hard, you will get a fortune. It's important to never quit and always show yourself some compassion; self love.
Sometimes we can be our own worst critic. Every "i" wont be dotted, every "t" will not be crossed. But no matter what don't quit. In the words of Cheryl Perkins, when you want to throw your hands up and quit, throw your feet up instead and let God carry you. He sees what you need. Do your part. You make a difference and can make an impact in someone's life.